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The Twelve Days of Audit
On the first day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
An operational deficiency.
On the second day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency.
On the third day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency.
On the fourth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the fifth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the sixth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the seventh day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the eighth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the ninth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the tenth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the eleventh day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Eleven examples of negligence,
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the twelfth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Twelve minutes to clear my office,
Eleven examples of negligence,
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
the C-Suite sent to me
An operational deficiency.
On the second day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency.
On the third day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency.
On the fourth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the fifth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the sixth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the seventh day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the eighth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the ninth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the tenth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the eleventh day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Eleven examples of negligence,
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
On the twelfth day of Audit,
the C-Suite sent to me
Twelve minutes to clear my office,
Eleven examples of negligence,
Ten hidden disbursements,
Nine offshore accounts,
Eight securities violations,
Seven misleading disclosures,
Six backdated options,
Five new findings,
Four material misstatements,
Three acts of fraud,
Two worthless controls,
And an operational deficiency!
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